I recently attended the 'Good Life, Good Death, Good Greif' conference in Glasgow. The conference gathered experts, caregivers and those who support families. It explored the complexities of dying, grief, and how we, as a society, can better address these often difficult topics. This year's theme was Demystifying Death. The event brought together a wide range of voices to talk about how to approach death in a more open, compassionate, and creative way.
One of the key themes that emerged was the importance of dispelling the myths around death as a life event and a process that takes time and requires ongoing attention. Allan Kellehear is a Professor in Health & Social Care at Northumbria University. He emphasised that death does not have to be a dark or mysterious topic. Instead, we should acknowledge that dying can span a long period, and grief is something that stays with us forever. He also said, that while grief may appear similar on the outside, it is a personal experience that looks different for each person. This in particular stuck with me. I think a lot of people believe that there is a grieving process. In reality, there are any number of grieving processes. Death and dying is different for everyone.
Creative Ways to Address Grief
Dominic Campbell is leader of the Irish Hospice Foundation’s Art and Cultural Engagement programme. He highlighted the role of art in helping individuals navigate death and grief. He said art has always been a means of making sense of change. It provides an outlet for expression, and fosters healing.
This talk was reinforced for me with the workshop I attended on ‘Unleashing Creativity and Conversations’. Artist John Martin Fulton led the session. He talked about his work with many community groups. He also spoke about the ‘The Library of Legends’ project which invited people to create art and talk about death, grief and loss. The focus was remembering loved ones who had died and creating art around items and colours that reminded you of them. I found this a wonderful way to think about the good memories of my family members who have passed away. One powerful takeaway from the conference around creative expression. It can create space for people to explore their feelings, understand their grief, and come to terms with the changes that death brings.
The idea of using creative formats to preserve memories particularly resonated with me. Amy Dalrymple is the Associate Director for Policy and Public Affairs at Marie Curie Scotland. She advocates for policy change surrounding dementia care. She emphasised the importance of engaging in conversations about what a person wants near the end of their life. This can be talking about where they want to spend their final moments and how they want to be remembered. Gestures like organising personal belongings and finding out if the person wants to write letters or record their life story can offer comfort and closure for everyone.
The Role of Audio Life Story Recordings in Preserving Legacies
This is where the concept of life story recordings, such as audio time capsules, comes into play. You can remember a loved one by capturing their voice, thoughts, and experiences in a way you can listen back to and pass on to future generations.
Recording a person’s life story gives families a personal record beyond photographs or writings. These recordings can provide an invaluable resource for future generations. It can help them understand the person behind the name, and offer insight into the shared experiences that shaped them.
Time Capsule Productions specialises in life story recordings. We offer a unique opportunity to create meaningful audio time capsules. These recordings capture more than life events. They convey the essence of the person - their emotions, reflections, and lessons learned. Combining their voice with the music they loved and sounds that bring their stories to life. As the world changes, life stories will serve as a source of comfort and a reminder of the lives before us.
Using an audio guestbook phone at a funeral or a wake can also be a wonderful way to remember the departed. It is a lovely way to help everyone say goodbye. The phone can be present at any memorial. It gives guests an opportunity to leave messages of support for the family, share a story from the life of those who passed. They can even leave a message for their loved one and say a final goodbye.
Addressing Funeral Poverty and the Practicalities of Dying
As well as focussing on the emotional and spiritual aspects of dying, other important discussions were more practical. Various speakers covered issues like funeral poverty. The concern over how families will afford a loved one’s funeral. Emma Kelso, Senior Funeral and Bereavement Advisor at Caledonia Funeral Aid was one of them. She said the anxiety surrounding the financial side of death is a growing concern for many families. Finding ways to ensure people can access dignified end-of-life care and ceremonies without added stress and worry about money is very important.
Kathryn Mannix, an expert in end-of-life care and cognitive behavioural therapy, also spoke about death myths. For example, one common misconception is that death is always a dramatic event. Kathryn explained the heart often stops last in a natural death. Breathing will usually stop before the heart. To me, the heart stopping last is so poetic, like their love persists for you as your love will persist for them.
Creating a Comfortable, Inclusive Space for Conversations
Caroline Gibb is a community development lead at the Scottish Partnership for Palliative Care. She shared a helpful framework for approaching difficult conversations around death and grief. She encouraged conference attendees to create spaces that are different from the norm. Spaces where people feel comfortable and relaxed. Having slow conversations, and being honest and mindful of individual differences and biases can help. She emphasised the importance of listening, showing understanding, and acknowledging that it is normal to feel upset and unsure during these discussions. I found that the guidance Caroline shared can also apply to recording life stories.
Final Thoughts: Honouring Lives Through Storytelling
On reflection, one of the most profound takeaways is the importance of telling stories - our own and those of others. Creative expression, having the right conversations, and preserving someone’s life story in an audio time capsule offer ways to celebrate life in a meaningful and lasting way.
Recording a loved one’s life story through audio creates a precious legacy for the family. It also helps us better understand and cope with the changes that death brings. Embracing death as a natural part of life and finding ways to honour the people we love, will help us move past the myths around death. It will let us approach grief with more compassion, acceptance, and peace.
Special thank you to Interfaith Celebrant Gillian Robertson and the Scottish Independent Celebrants Association for inviting me along and allowing me to display with you.
For more information about life story recording and audio time capsules, click here!
Useful Links:
Good Life, Good Death, Good Grief
Kathryn Maddix
Scottish Partnership for Palliative Care
Berevement Charter
Marie Curie Scotland
Caledonia Funeral Aid
Alzheimer Scotland
John Martin Fulton Art
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